Cherry's Past
by tomisaqt
Summary: In The Outsiders, Ponyboy explains the gang's past and describes each of its members in turn. So, we know, to a certain degree, what life has been life for them. But what about Cherry Valance? No explanations of her past are given. SE H. owns the Outsider
1. Chapter 1

When I met Ponyboy, I knew that he was good friend material. He was quiet and a good listener. But most of al, he had been through almost everything I had.

That night at the movies, I wanted to tell him everything. Everything about my horrible childhood and teenage years up to that very day sat on the tip of my tongue, ready to burst out at the right time.

But that time never came.

As much as I wanted to tell Ponyboy, I couldn't risk Dallas, Johnny, AND Marcia hearing. Marcia may be my best friend, but she has no clue why I've missed countless weeks of school ever since kindergarten or why I'm so sensitive about drinking and death. Bob only knows a little over ¼ of my past.

Ponyboy would understand, I told myself. Just ask him to go get a drink with you and ditch the others for at least 5 minutes. So I asked, but before I could tell him, a question popped out that I had been holding in all night.

On the walk home, I learned more about him than I think even his brothers knew. I think it scared him how easy it was to talk to me about everything that bothered him. It scared me too.

Bob and Randy caught up with us and that's when everything changed. Bob's death added to my extremely long (and growing) list of childhood/adolescent tragedies. I still had the urge to tell Pony everything, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. So I kept it a secret from yet another person.

Every day I dreaded seeing his green-eyed, bleach-blonde haired self. I wanted so badly, needed in fact, to tell him and everyday the need intensified. But I wasn't the only one who kept a secret. It seemed to me that everyday since Ponyboy and Johnny returned from Windrixville, Ponyboy had gotten quieter and quieter.

Sure, he would still attempt to say hi to me at school, but I ignored him. I was afraid of the bond. I didn't know, however, that he knew I had a secret.

This chapter was basically summing up the events before she spills to Pony. The story will be mostly in Cherry's point of view, and a few chapters when she starts telling Ponyboy her story will be in Ponyboy's point of view. But assume that it's in Cherry's point of view unless otherwise specified. I hope everybody likes it. I kept thinking about writing something like this, because I realized that out of all the Outsiders fanfics, none were about Cherry's past. Please tell me what you think. I hope nobody had this idea before me. It's my first Outsiders fanfic, so please no flames!


	2. Chapter 2

"Hello, is Cherry Valance available?" I heard a familiar voice coming from the front door.

"Yes," I heard Micah answer. "May I please tell her who you are?" Micah was always the one in the family with the manners.

"Could you please tell her that Ponyboy Curtis needs to speak to her?" Ponyboy answered with just as much courtesy.

"Yes, please hold on."

I heard the front door close and Micah's footsteps running to my bedroom.

"Cherry, a boy named Ponyboy Curtis needs to speak to you. He is waiting for you at the front door. I think he's really nice!"

"Thank you Micah," I replied as I got up off of my bed and set my magazine down on my nightstand.

"Hey Ponyboy!" I said as I reached the door.

"Hi Cherry."

"What's up?" I asked pulling the heavy oak door shut behind me so that no little eavesdroppers could listen.

"I just wanted to talk to you. You never talk to me at school, and I missed having the instant connection between us. I know you're a Soc and I'm a greaser, but no one else understands me the way you and….Johnny did." His voice got real quiet at the end of that last sentence, and that's saying something since he's already a quiet person.

"I'm sorry Ponyboy. It's just, I've been having a real tough time since Bob died. Someone spread a horrible rumor that I was going to break up with Bob and I didn't miss him at all. By the time I heard the message, it even included that I'm glad he's dead."

"That horrible!" he exclaimed softly, and his eyes looked really sad.

"I know….Is there anything particular you wanted to talk about? Because it's getting dark and….wait a second, did you walk here all on your own?"

"Well, yeah….I really wanted to talk to you…."

"Oh Ponyboy….Do you know how dangerous that is?" I realized just then how much I must mean to him. He walked all the way to the Westside by himself just to see me….

"Listen Cherry….Ever since that night at the movies, I've sensed that you've been hiding something from me but that you want to tell me…"

So he knew. He knew I wasn't spilling. I owe him, though. If he walked over here just to talk to me, then I owe him enough to tell him my secret.


	3. Chapter 3

"Well Ponyboy…." I trailed off. I wasn't sure how to begin.

"Listen, Cherry, if you don't' want to tell me, that's okay. I understand. I'll just be leaving. Darry's gonna be worried sick as it is because I'm late for a dinner I won't eat anyway…" He turned to leave and started walking.

"Ponyboy wait!" I yelled a little too loudly.

"What is it Cherry?" I told you if you're not ready to talk that I understand. It's because I'm a greaser."

"No, it's not that," I pleaded. "It's just I don't know how to start. You're the only one I can tell. Nobody knows about my past. Not even Bob knew. You're the only person who will ever be able to understand what I've been through. So please, just stay long enough for me to begin. I'll probably only be able to start tonight, but if you sit by me at lunch for the next couple of days, I'll tell you the rest then."

"I don't know….Won't your Soc friends get mad if I'm sitting with you?" he asked hesitantly.

"I don't hang out with them. Any of them. They only treated me nicely because I was dating Bob. Now that he's gone…" My voice died off. It was too hard for me to continue. But the look in Pony's eyes said that he understood.

"Okay. But can you start soon? I really don't want Darry to worry," he replied. His eyes pleaded with me. I could read every single emotion that he felt. He didn't have to speak a word. It was like reading a book.

"Here it goes. When I was born, my parents had already had one child. She was 4 when Shawn and I were born. Two weeks later, Alex died of pneumonia. She had really week lungs and the pneumonia was just too much. My parents were devastated. They tried to have another child, but they couldn't," I said in sort of a rush. It was hard for me, and I took a deep breath.

"Is Shawn your twin?" Ponyboy asked in that short amount of time that I took a breath.

"Well, he was. That's the next part. When we were two, my father was overseas. He's in the military. I don't remember where he was, but I do remember that he was overseas. My aunt had brought my cousins over for lunch after church one Sunday. Jacob, who is my age, Shawn, and Christopher, who is older than Jacob by 14 years, were playing chase in the cul-de-sac. Our neighborhood was really safe. We weren't a very rich neighborhood, but we had a security guard and a gate to keep unwanted visitors out along with a neighborhood watch system in which all of the people in the neighborhood were apart of.

"Apparently, a prank call, totally unrelated to what was going on that day, called the lady who was on duty that afternoon. They told her that all of her family that lived in New York had been killed that day with the exception of her youngest son and his wife and one of her other children's daughter. It turned out to be a wrong number, but the news caused her to have a heart attack. The security guard escorted her to the hospital, but the gate was left open.

"Ten minutes later, a drunk driver came barreling down the 25 MPH road. Christopher noticed somebody going down the road way to fast and grabbed me and Jacob. He yelled for Shawn to follow us, but Shawn didn't listen to anybody except for my dad."

I had to take a long steadying breath here. This was always the hardest part. I couldn't stand to remember it, let alone speak it out loud.

"Maybe we should pick up here tomorrow, Cherry. By the look on your face and the pain in your eyes, the next part is really difficult for you. So let's just finish tomorrow," Ponyboy said, looking me straight in the eyes.

"Thanks Ponyboy." I knew just from that that he really truly cared for me. That care and understanding meant more to me then than anything else in the world.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Cherry," Ponyboy added. Just then, Darry drove up in his truck and honked his horn. I waved and walked inside as the Curtis brothers drove off.


	4. Chapter 4

I know, it's been like almost 6 months since I updated. But I had good enough excuses. I'll explain to anyone who wishes to know, but there's way too many to list here. So, this chapter is going to be half in Ponyboy's point of view and half in Cherry's POV. Enjoy!

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**Ponyboy's POV:**

I climbed silently into the truck beside Sodapop. Darry had a look on his face that I couldn't quite interpret. It was a look of mingled worry, angst and anger. Those were the best times to just keep your mouth shut. So, that's exactly what I did.

About halfway to the house, Darry started to yell. I sat still, staring out the window at the passing houses and kept my mouth shut.

"Ponyboy, what the hell were you thinking? Walking over to the West side alone? You could have been jumped and none of us would have been able to find you. Lucky us Two-Bit told us that you were planning on heading over to Cherry's," Darry yelled. Silent tears filled my eyes, but I wiped them away quickly.

"I was just trying to talk to Cherry. I wanted to know why she wouldn't talk to me at school," I lied. I couldn't tell Darry about the bond between us. Only Johnny would understand, and maybe Sodapop.

"You should have let me or Soda drive you. It's almost dark and you walked here all on your own!"

"I shouldn't have to have someone with me everywhere I go!" I exclaimed back at Darry. Soda had remained quiet the whole time. "I'm almost 15 years old! I should be old enough to walk from my house to the other side of town by myself!"

I couldn't hold the tears back anymore. They streamed freely down my face. I looked over at Soda and the laughter in his eyes. The tears were rolling down his face too. Soda put his arm on my shoulders and squeezed them gently as we pulled up in front of our house.

Darry got out of the truck and slammed the door behind him. He stormed up to the house and threw that door open, too. He then proceeded to slam the front door and then walk to his bedroom and slam that door as well.

"Soda, why can't he just leave me alone? I'm almost 15 years old. I can take care of myself without him following me around all the time," I asked softly, wiping my eyes.

"He just wants to keep you safe, Pone. He doesn't want to lose you, too. If anything happened to you again, he'd never be able to stop feeling guilty. Even though he seems to be tougher on you than on me, it's because he knows how much potential you have and that it would devastate all of us if something happened to you. We almost lost you once; we don't want that to happen again because who knows what could happen the next time," he replied, pulling me into a hug.

Soda sat down on the couch and I sat on the floor at his feet. He rubbed my shoulders and as I was nodding off, Darry burst out of his room.

"Pony, don't you understand that all I want to do is keep you safe? Soda and I would be devastated if anything happened to you. We don't want to lose you like we lost Mom, Dad, Johnny and Dallas," he said, his eyes pleading with me. The previous anger was replaced by worry and sadness.

"Could we keep Johnny and Dal out of this?" I asked.

"Pone, you've got to get over this. It's not just going to go away. The only way the pain is going to stop is if you talk about it," Darry replied sharply.

"We've been through this, Dar," Soda spoke up for the first time all night. "He knows that he needs to talk about it. It only makes it worse when you bring it up in every conversation. You know how sensitive he is about it."

Darry didn't argue with Soda. It always amazed me how nobody could ever be mad at Soda, not even Darry.

"Next time you need to talk to somebody on that side of town, get Two-Bit or one of us to drive you over there."

"Excuse me for not wanting to pull you two away from your jobs. And I'd rather not rip Two-Bit away from his precious alcohol. I'm perfectly capable of walking there."

Darry started to argue, but Two-Bit and Steve burst into the house just then. Steve wasn't quite as loud as Two-Bit. Two-Bit was quite obviously drunk and sat down promptly, with the beer still in his hands.

"Hey, Steve," Soda said, getting up off the couch. He was glad that he finally had an excuse to get away from the yelling.

"Hey, Sodapop," he said. "You wanna go down and catch the game down at the school? I think we're playing against that prep school across town, but I'm not sure. Evie and I were thinkin' about going and she suggested askin' you."

"I don't know, buddy. I think I should probably stay here and make sure that my brothers don't rip each other's throats out," Soda said. I could tell he wanted to go, but he didn't voice it.

"Come on, man. You stay here _every _weekend and make sure that your brothers don't kill each other. If they can't be responsible for 4 hours, then I think they should go to obedience school."

Soda laughed and gave into Steve's taunting. He grabbed his jacket and followed Steve out the door. Two-Bit stayed put. I was about to ask him why he didn't follow Steve and Soda when I realized he had passed out.

**Cherry's POV:**

The next day at school, I waited for Ponyboy in the cafeteria. He walked into the cafeteria and spotted me across the way. He walked over to me and we walked outside.

"Hey Cherry," he said quietly.

"Hey Ponyboy," I replied. I walked over to a table and Pony followed me. I let him sit for a few moments before I started. I figured I would let him eat, but seeing that he had no intentions to, I started.

"Christopher couldn't get to Shawn in time. The car hit him. The driver didn't slow down, either. He just kept going. And it wasn't like the car ran him over. The car was going so fast that instead of Shawn dropping to the street, he was pinned to the front of the car. Chris chased the car until the car slowed down enough for Shawn to drop to the street. Then the driver sped off.

"My mom and aunt had heard all the screaming outside and rushed out in time to see the driver speed off down the road. They did head checks and saw that Christopher was chasing the car and saw that Shawn was no where in sight. They called the police and the paramedics. By the time Chris got to Shawn the paramedics were there. We lived about 5 minutes away from the fire station. They rushed Shawn to the hospital but they told us it was probably too late. He was dead before we reached the hospital."

I finished and looked at my hands. It felt good to be able to tell someone after so many years, but I was close to tears now and I didn't want to cry at school.

"I'm so sorry, Cherry. I had no idea," Pony added softly.

"Pony," I said, looking up from my hands. "Are you keeping something from me?"

Before he could answer me, though, the bell rang and Pony said goodbye. He rushed off to class and got lost in the crowd.


	5. Chapter 5

**So new chapter. I promise I'm not going to let it go six months before I update this again. That was awful to do to you all. It might be six weeks, but that would be the most I let this go un-updated. Enjoy and tell me what you think!

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**Cherry's POV**

Ponyboy met me in the same spot a couple of days later. He had been absent for those few days, and I had every intention of finding out what.

"Ponyboy, why were you absent?" I asked him.

"I was…sick," he replied, but I could tell he was lying.

"Are you sure that you were just sick?" I asked him. He nodded, but kept staring at the floor. I sighed and saw I had no choice but to continue my story.

"We all went to the funeral, but Dad couldn't come. His commander said that military personnel can't just drop everything and go in the case of a family emergency. He was mad, but told us that as soon as he could, he'd come home and stay for as long as possible. He didn't get to come home until his overseas time was up, but when he did, he spent all the time he could with us. Mom got pregnant again, and they were ecstatic.

"The twins that you met the other day were born nine months later. They were healthy and no more unfortunate events occurred that caused one of them to die a horrible death. Dad didn't get sent back overseas for several more years," I finished.

"Wow, that's horrible. I mean, you've had so much horrible stuff happen to you in your life time. It's worse than everything that's happened to me," Ponyboy replied.

"That's not all of it, but it's no where near as tragic to what happened to you and your brothers. I mean, you guys lost your parents and then two of your best friends who were as close as brothers. I only lost a brother. I still have both of my parents."

Pony was quiet after that. I could tell he was thinking, but I didn't know what.

"Ponyboy?" I asked quietly. "Are you okay?"

"Huh?" he asked, jumping. I had clearly startled him. "Oh, I'm fine. I was just thinking. I shouldn't do that as much, Darry says that I'm gonna get hit by a car or something if I daydream like that when I'm walking, but I keep doing it."

"Pony, why were you absent yesterday?" I asked. I didn't think that anything could go wrong at their house, but I just wanted to be sure.

"I was sick, I already told you. I had a cold and Darry didn't want to take me to the doctor's so he just told me to stay home with Two-Bit. Two-Bit happened to be suffering from a hang-over so he came over and we were sick together. I'm telling the truth, I wouldn't lie about being sick."

I was about to say something about maybe he was sick because he never ate, but the bell rang. He jumped up, waved to me, and got lost in the tide of students once more.

**Ponyboy POV**

I had to get out of there. Cherry kept pressuring me, and I couldn't take it. Yeah, we were good friends and she was one of the few who I could talk to openly, but I couldn't tell her the _real_ reason I had missed school for three days. It was hard to even think about it, let alone talk about it.

Don't get me wrong, I really had been sick. It was almost like I perfectly planned it, but I didn't. It was a coincidental thing that I got sick. I would have been excused anyways, considering the day, but it worked in my favor that I was sick.

I walked home from school that day. Two-Bit was 'sick' again and Steve didn't have a seventh period so he left early to go to work. I usually rode home with Two-Bit but when I could walk I enjoyed it.

I opened the front door to find Two-Bit sleeping on the couch. He had a bowl by his side, which I avoided because I already knew what was in it. I tried to close the door as quietly as possible, but he must have been sleeping lightly because he still woke up.

"Huh? Who's there?" he asked, startled.

"It's just Ponyboy," I replied. "Why aren't you ever any use when a real burglar is breaking in?"

"Shoot, kid, you've never had a real burglar break in. If you had, the whole neighborhood would've heard about it," he said, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. He looked down at the floor and saw the bowl. He walked it to the bathroom and dumped it in the toilet.

'At least he didn't dump it in the kitchen sink,' I thought.

"Hey, kid, have you been to the cemetery yet?" he asked.

"No, Darry and Soda won't take me. They said that it should be something we do together. And they think we should wait till the weekend. I don't know…" my voice wandered off as Soda walked through the door.

"Hey Pone, hey Two-Bit!" my brother exclaimed. He stripped his shoes and socks off and went to his room to change. I went into the kitchen to start supper. Darry would be home soon and he'd want his dinner.

The whole time I was cooking, I couldn't stop thinking about what Cherry had told me. 'It perfectly fits. She told me that it's rough all over. She's got it rough, all right,' I thought.


	6. Chapter 6

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**Cherry's POV**

Ponyboy had been acting really odd lately. He missed three days of school and said he was sick. I didn't believe him, though.

I had cheerleading after school that day, so on my way home I stopped by the Curtis household. I pulled up in the street in front of their house and walked through the gate. I heard yelling coming from inside, and it seemed to be coming from the same person.

"Ponyboy, we've been through this before! Sure, this day is special, but you don't see the rest of us acting any differently. You missed three days of school, and today should have been the only day!" Darry yelled.

I didn't hear any reply, but after a moment Darry yelled again.

"So what if you were sick? How do I know if you were even really sick? Ponyboy, one day is one thing, but three days? That's unbelievable! Your teachers called me at work to tell me that you weren't at school! Who gave you permission to skip?"

A new voice replied to him.

"Darry, he was puking his guts out for three days! If he had gone to school, he could have gotten everybody else sick and then you would have really heard it from the school! It was a coincidental thing that he was sick the three days before the anniversary of Mom and Dad's death!" Sodapop screamed.

The house got real quiet after that. I figured that was my que to knock. I rapped gently on the door and within a minute the door was swung open. Ponyboy's tear-stained face scared me. He had told me that Darry and he were getting along better.

"Ponyboy, what happened?" I exclaimed. "You look awful!"

"I'm fine," he said.

"No, you're not! Why didn't you tell me that today was the anniversary of your parents' death?"

"Because I didn't want anyone to know, that's why!" he sobbed. "I'll be fine in a minute." He sat down on the step and wiped his eyes on his shirt. "Why does Darry have to be like that?" he asked suddenly. "I mean, I really was sick. It just worked out in my favor that I was sick the days leading up to today. He won't even take me to the cemetery. We've been getting along great lately, but when it gets closer to days like today, everything goes downhill."

I thought for a minute before I answered him. "Ponyboy, maybe taking out his anger on you and Sodapop is his way of coping with the grief. True, it's not a good way to deal with the grief, but everyone deals with things like that their own way."

"Why does he have to take his anger out on me and Soda though? We haven't done anything to set him off lately. If he should be yelling at anybody it should be Two-bit."

Something did strike me as odd, though. I realized that Ponyboy had said that Darry knew he was sick. But Darry had just been yelling at Ponyboy for missing school without permission. I didn't ask him, though.

"Why didn't you skip today as well, Ponyboy?" I asked.

"I had already missed too much school and Darry would have killed me if I only went to school one day this week. He said that because I was sick for 3 days, it made up for going today. Cherry?" he asked.

"Yes, Pony?"

"Can you finish your story, or do you need to go home?"

"I can start wrapping it up, but I'll probably have to go home before I completely finish."

He nodded in agreement and sat with his head in his hands.

"Dad got sent back overseas when the twins were five years old. Right after he left, mom got real sick. She went to the doctor and found out that she was pregnant again, but it had gone unnoticed and she was under so much stress raising three children on her own that it was probably the baby's way of letting her know she was pregnant.

"We were all happy, and Mom called Dad as soon as she could. He told her he would try to come home in time for the delivery, but he couldn't make any promises. The baby was born, and Dad still wasn't home. He came home when the baby was six months old."

I paused, looking at Pony's face, trying to read it. It was unfathomable, though. I looked at my watch, and realized that I should have been home ten minutes ago.

"Ponyboy, I have to go. Mom will get worried if I'm not home in time for dinner. I'll just tell her that cheerleading practice ran a little over and there was an accident that held traffic up."

"Bye Cherry," he said softly.

I got into my car and drove off, back to the land of Socs.

**Ponyboy POV**

I was still trying to cool off while Cherry told me her story. I figured that maybe if she told me some more of her hard times that maybe mine wouldn't look so bad and I could feel sorry for her instead of myself.

Cherry stopped and said she had to leave for supper. That meant that I had to go back inside the house and listen to Darry yell some more.

I watched Cherry drive off and then walked inside the house. Darry and Soda were quietly eating supper, and Two-bit was passed out on the couch again.

"Ponyboy," Soda started.

"Save it, Soda." I walked back to our room and shut the door. My homework had piled up over the three days I had missed, and the polished wood of the desk was no longer visible amongst the papers, books and pencils.

Soda and Darry began arguing about something, but I tuned them out. I had a slight headache, and I didn't want to hear them. I waited for them to clear out of the kitchen so that I could grab a handful of aspirins. Yet, something that they said caught my attention.

"Darry, he's not looking real good," Soda piped up. "Have you noticed how pale he is? He's never been this pale before, not even after he got back from Windrixville and then got sick after Johnny and Dallas died. Maybe something's wrong that he's not letting us know about."

"Soda, if he was really truly sick then he'd let us know so we could help him," Darry replied, but he didn't sound so sure.

"Darry, sometimes you are completely oblivious to what our little brother needs!" Soda exclaimed. "Something's spooking him, or he's sick or something, but something's not right here!"

"I'm completely fine!" I said loud enough for them to hear me.

The door swung open and Darry and Soda saw me sitting at the desk.

"Ponyboy, we thought you were asleep!" Darry exclaimed. "What are you doing up?"

"I _was_ doing homework before you two interrupted me with your talk about me being sick. I'm fine! Do I _look_ sick to you?"

Darry walked over and squatted down to my level. He looked at me in the eye and then put his hand on my forehead. The look on his face changed immediately. He turned to Soda and whispered in his ear. Then he picked me up and carried me to the truck. Before we got to the front door, I had passed out.

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**I want to round this story out at 10 chapters, so I had to add something to extend it more. You'll get to hear the rest of Cherry's story in the next chapter. Reviews help, so tell me what you think!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Yeah, yeah, I know. It's not my fault though! I really wanted to finish the other story before my mind got foggy and I got writer's block for that one. And then I had basketball camp. But now that my other stories are complete, I can spend more time on this one. You get to hear most of Cherry's story in this chapter. Enjoy!**

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**Darry's POV**

So Soda was right. How was I supposed to know that Pony wouldn't tell us if he was sick? I had just figured that it was stress from the whole week. And then he got sick and threw up for three days.

We got him to the hospital and the doctor saw him immediately. It only took a couple of minutes for them to diagnose him. They told us mostly what we already knew, but the last bit worried us, especially Soda. I had never had to deal with this before, and neither had he. Neither of us had ever been that sick before.

"Mr. Curtis?" the doctor said as he walked out of the examining room.

"Yes?" both of us answered.

"It seems Ponyboy is going through a tough time. Is there anything that could be causing him more stress than usual? Anything causing him to grieve?"

"Well, today is the anniversary of our parents' death. He had what we thought was the stomach flu for the past three days, but he went to school today because he said he was feeling better," I replied.

"He has mononucleosis," the doctor told us. "It can be brought on by several things. Kissing someone else who has the disease, stress, and a number of other things can bring on the illness."

"What do we do to get him better?" Soda asked. His face was almost as pale as Pony's had been and he was sweating real badly.

"There's not much anybody can do. Bed rest, lots of fluids, you can give him ibuprofen if he develops a headache. Also, if he shares a room with either of you, the other needs to move out because it has the potential to be contagious. The most important thing is to keep his stress level down."

"Thank you," I said. Soda and I entered the examination room to find Pony sitting on the edge of the bed. His eyes were real big and he looked like something had spooked him.

"Hey, little brother," I said, joining him on the bed. "You ready to leave?"

He nodded. I picked him up and he didn't fight me. We walked out to the truck and he was asleep before we got home.

**Pony POV**

I woke up the next morning feeling just as tired as I had the night before. I looked at my desk, hoping some of the work had disappeared, but it hadn't. I looked beside me, noticing Soda had already gotten up.

Pulling the covers off of my body, I walked out of the room to the living room where Darry and Soda were sitting.

"Ponyboy, what do you think you're doing?" Darry exclaimed.

"Getting ready to go to school, like always. Aren't you going to make me eat breakfast?" I asked, confused.

"Pony, you're sick. And it's Saturday. You won't be going to school for at least another week. Now, go back to your room and try to get more sleep. Soda will bring in some juice and something light to eat later."

I trudged back to my room, glad that I wouldn't be going to school. I crawled back into bed and fell asleep.

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A few hours later, I woke up once more, the sun shining in my eyes. A glass of juice was sitting on the nightstand, but nothing to eat. It was just as well for me because I wouldn't have eaten whatever they brought anyways. 

I sat up in bed and drank the orange juice. It felt good on my tongue because my throat was so dry. As I was drinking, Soda opened the door to come in and check on me.

"Hey, Pony," he said, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Is that juice good?" he laughed, noticing how fast I was drinking.

"I was thirsty, that's all," I said as I set the now empty glass back on the table. "Soda?"

"Yeah, baby?"

"Am I real sick?" I asked.

"Yeah, Pony, you are. You have mononucleosis. The doc says it could take anywhere from a week to two months for you to get well enough to go back to school. And I have to sleep in my old room."

"Why do you have to sleep in your old room? What if I have a nightmare?"

"The doctor doesn't want anybody else to get sick. At least not from our house, anyways. And I'll be right next door if you have a nightmare."

There was a knock on the bedroom door and Soda got up to answer it. There stood Cherry in the doorway.

"Is this a bad time?" she asked. "Darry let me in and said that you guys were back here."

"No, it's fine. I was just getting ready to leave. I have to go into work for a couple of hours, Pone. I'll be back soon."

He gave me a kiss on the forehead and left the room. Cherry stood there awkwardly until she broke the silence.

"What happened, Pony?" she asked. "You said you were better."

"I was better. But I had a fever last night and Darry and Soda took me to the doctor last night. I have mononucleosis."

She stood there, speechless. "I was hoping I could tell you some more of the story," she finally said. I nodded, and immediately wished I hadn't for the pounding that answered the nod.

**Cherry POV**

I sat at Pony's desk and started to wrap up my story.

"Bob and I started dating when we were 14. The twins were 11. The baby, Nathan, was about 5. Dad was in Pennsylvania for some military training for a year. When I turned fifteen, Bob started complaining that I didn't spend enough time with him. He didn't understand that I needed to help mom with my siblings.

"It was a Saturday, and Mom told me to go out with Bob for the day. Since it was summer, we decided to go out in the backyard and go swimming. He and I were sitting on the deck when Nathan and the twins came out of the house in their swim trunks. Nathan sat down on the edge of the pool and dangled his feet in the water. The twins jumped in and kept teasing Nathan that he couldn't get in because Mom had gone out.

"Bob crawled into the chair with me, noticing how tense I had become with the boys coming out to the pool and Mom not being home. He started kissing me and before I knew it I heard a splash. I pushed Bob off of me and saw Nathan in the pool. He had fallen in and hit his head on the side of the pool. I jumped in and got him out while the twins called an ambulance. Bob just stood there."

I paused, trying to calm down because it was hard for me to remember.

"The ambulance came and they loaded Nathan in the back. He had lost a lot of blood. Marcia came over and watched the twins while I went to the hospital with Nathan. When Mom got home, she rushed over to the hospital after the twins and Marcia told her what happened.

"He died later that night. The doctors couldn't do anything for him. He had lost too much blood and had broken his back when he fell. Dad got special permission to come to the funeral. Even though nobody has told me this, I know it was my fault he died."

I finished off. I buried my face in my hands and tried my best not to cry.

"Cherry, it's not your fault!" Pony exclaimed. "You didn't know he was going to fall in. He wasn't even supposed to be out there, and it wasn't your responsibility to be watching him that day."

"I know, but if I had been paying attention! If I had only pushed Bob off a moment sooner, or not even let him start, Nathan would still be here! He was too young to die. So was Shawn. And Dallas and Johnny and Bob and everybody that die when they're teenagers or younger!"

"Cherry, you can't blame yourself! I tried blaming myself for Johnny and Dallas's deaths. Hell, I even tried to blame myself for Mom and Dad's deaths. But look where it's gotten me. The stress has landed me in a bed with mononucleosis and out of school for at least a week, probably even longer. You can't blame yourself!"

Darry opened the bedroom door. "I think you need to leave, Cherry," he said. "Ponyboy needs his rest if he wants to return to school in the next month."

"Bye Cherry," Pony said.

"Bye Pony," I replied. Darry walked me out and I drove off, feeling like something had finally been relieved from me.


End file.
